The Response Archive is a collection of past questions and responses. The letters below best reflected the overall nature of the mail we received the week they were posted. Keep in mind all the letters we receive are important to us, and we answer them with genuine concern and appreciation for the writer and his/her situation.
Recent questions and answers can be found in our Response Response Section.
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(All of the following questions are from real people, and were posted with their approval)
"I have been crying almost every night because I hate my life. Well, everyone tries to run it for me. They all want me to
break up with my boyfriend ... I do but I don't. Sometimes he is very nice and other times he is so nasty. But the problem is that I live with him and I have no place to go. What should I do?"
I can only encourage you to be brave. Remember that you are a person, and that you deserve to be just as happy as everyone else. If your boyfriend is treating you badly, perhaps you should break up with him, even if it means sacrificing a place to stay and going out on your own. But don't do this because your friends and family are pressuring you to, or because of our advice. Do what is best for you, and don't be afraid of taking a risk.
"I want to change schools because I have no friends, but my parents won't let me unless its an 'education thing'. They will NEVER understand. Don't tell me to talk to them -- it won't work; I've tried! HELP!"
It's obvious that you have trouble communicating with your parents, and I sympathize for you. Just remember that your parents mean well, and feel they're doing what's best for you. Ask yourself why you want to change schools. Then take the time to explain to your parents, calmly, why you're having trouble making new friends. Make sure you have good explanation, and good reasons for changing schools. I know that's not what you want to hear, but it is the best advice I can give you. If you can't find a friend in an entire school, maybe its time you examined why that is, and make a conscious effort to adjust to your environment.
"Hi, my name is X. I'm very bored of life. Everyday the same old stuff keeps on happening. And I'm sure taking a break from my work won't help me much. I just don't understand what the purpose of my life is -- Is it just going to college, play, come back home and sleep, that's it?
Sometimes I feel that I should KILL myself! Can anybody advise me on what to do to make my life more meaningful and happy?"
X, I am very sorry to hear that you find life boring and not worth living. There is always a period in one's life when questions like yours are asked. And as much as we wish we could sit back and let life entertain us, we can't, simply because it won't. We can't wait for miracles to happen. It's up to the individual to make life exciting; to set goals and challenges for oneself. Maybe college is just the first step towards a long term goal you may have. And even though it may seem like a grind now, some day you'll be able to see how important it was to shaping the course of your life.
Try to take a genuine interest in the people, places and the world around you, and you'll notice opportunities will begin to surface. You'll be surprised by what can happen, just by opening a door for someone or striking up conversations with people you don't ordinarily talk to. You have to take the initiative if you want life to be fulfilling. The world is full of unpredictable events.
More importantly, everyone is born with a certain set of talents and attributes, and there is plenty of room in the world to develop and nuture the gifts we have. I can't tell you what will make you happy -- that is something you have to discover on your own. And the only way to do that is to get out into the world and make it happen. During your life journey, your world will start to change and evolve into something more exciting.
